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Get Paid What You Deserve

When you get to the point of talking money, it means you have successfully navigated most of the way through a process. Perhaps your interview was a hit, and you’ve been offered the job. Or maybe the new client saw your website and wants to work with you. It’s the moment where you get to discuss the details and the dollars. Feel a little nervous just thinking about what your work is worth? Do you struggle to state your price? You are not alone. This topic is fraught with anxiety for even the most competent among us. Here are 5 tips to be Effectively Frank™ about money, so you can set the fear aside and get focused on getting paid what you deserve. Flip It The first thing that needs to happen is to set aside your discomfort and anxiety.     . . . read more

The Surprising Thing Authentic People Do (That You Probably Don’t)

Amongst people at dinner parties, networking events, and behind the closed door of my office, I hear, “I don’t want drama. I want honesty. I dislike fakey-fake.” Then invariably I hear this declaration from one of the people I just described, in response to some interpersonal issue they are having: “You know what the problem is? I’m just too nice!”  My response to this statement depends on the audience. If you have the misfortune of being my friend, I drop a (loving) truth bomb on you. Otherwise, I make my point a little more gently and in time. If you’re my blog reader, I’ll tell you like this: No, you are definitely not too nice. You can’t be too nice. What you are actually talking about is being dishonest, cowardly, and part of the problem you say you want to avoid.      . . . read more

The Overwhelm Cure: Using the Positive Power of No

I truly could not be more excited to be offering this workshop, The Overwhelm Cure: Using the Positive Power of “No”. It is designed to make a profound and immediate impact on managing stress and increasing joy by knowing how, when, and why to say “no” (while still being kind). Here are the details:  The Overwhelm Cure: Using the Positive Power of “No” Tuesday, May 24th from 5:30-8:30pm 203 Anderson Street, Portland Feeling overwhelmed by trying to do it all? Wishing there were more hours in your day? Checking all the boxes and still feeling unfulfilled? It’s time to find your confidence by saying “no” without apology.  Don’t wait another day to create time for things that truly matter.   This workshop is right for you if: You say “yes” to things that bog you down and end up feeling resentful.     . . . read more

Love, Process, and Letting Go: What I Learned as My Daughter Made Valentines

“It will take one hundred years!” I said a bit (okay, a lot) immaturely to my 5 year-old daughter mimicking her usual phrase. She wanted to trace, cut out, decorate, and write names on 19 homemade heart-shaped valentines for her nursery school classmates. Wanting to avoid the time, imagined tears of frustration (hers and mine!), and perceived stress, I proposed I at least cut them out. I pictured hearts made with nice smooth scissor edges. That proposal was shot down. I hung out cleaning the kitchen instead, until it was painfully obvious I was not needed at all. Sometime later that afternoon, I was proven totally wrong. Those 19 valentines were done. My heart felt so full seeing them on the table after watching her plug away undaunted by the task at hand. These pieces of paper, which I doubt     . . . read more

Do You Need to Be Right?

The motivation is clear: it can feel so good, so powerful to be “right.” But is it really worth it? What do you gain? The truth is: you can pursue being right but at the cost of being unhappy. Basically, if you approach conversations, dialogue, or arguments with the intention to “win” or “be right” you are playing a lonely game. How we interact with others is not a sport. You can’t win, but you can certainly lose the relationship. Every interaction is a chance to connect or disconnect, to step towards understanding or discord. If you treat your interactions as a chance to “one up” another person, you are fundamentally missing the point. You will continue to create disconnection- even if you feel you have “won.” You have to decide what’s actually important- do you want to be right or     . . . read more

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