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Motivation and Change: Is it Worth It?

This is the second blog in the motivation series. You can catch up with the first one here. It seems to me that everyone likes to be motivated, so it may disappoint you to know that you can’t be motivated to do everything. The overachievers out there hate to admit this, but there is only so much time, energy, and focus. Our mental, physical, and emotional capacity has limits. Trying to push past these limits is unhealthy and problematic (more on that another time!). When you are thinking about making changes and working on feeling motivated, a crucial step is to get real with your capacity to make the change. First you have to decide how important something really is to you. Not how important you think it SHOULD be, but how important is truly is. I don’t care who     . . . read more

Motivation and Change: What You Don’t Know Can’t Help You

Understanding what motivates us is incredibly rich and useful information. Unfortunately, most of us are totally clueless about how motivation works. We think we know, but we don’t. This week, I’m featuring a series that is intended to help you better understand motivation so that you can apply it to your life. Change is not just about doing. It’s fueled by an internal process. Thoughts and feelings are as essential to the change process as action. If you focus on what you are doing, but not the thoughts and feelings, it’s a set-up. You can’t truly be successful. If you want to be motivated, you need a strategy. It has to be intentional. Motivation is not an accident. The most common myth is that you wait for motivation to strike you. You will be waiting a very long time. This     . . . read more

The Seasons are Changing. How about you?

Welcome to fall! It’s probably my favorite season. Cool nights and warm days. Autumn colors and yummy flavors. But that’s not what this post is about…it’s about making some changes! This fall, I’m over at CrossFit 321 with a series on Strategies for Sustained Success. It’s all about the crucial psychological aspects of making lasting life changes. I’m discussing motivation, the psychology behind food and exercise choices, ways to maintain progress and how to bounce-back from inevitable setbacks. Making some changes of your own? I’m going to be featuring all the topics covered in my Strategies for Sustained Success series right here on the blog. Up first is a full week of posts on change and motivation starting on Monday. Have a question you want answered? Write me at [email protected] and I’ll be sure to include the info (without your     . . . read more

Not Saying Has Consequences

I’ve come to believe that not saying anything is the most over-used communication strategy in couples. It’s not a bad strategy when used appropriately. For example, there are many things you might choose not to talk about because they are minor and would offend for no reason: a style choice, a passing grumpy mood, a silly mistake. The saying, if you don’t have something nice to say, don’t say anything at all, makes sense to me. No need to criticize without a purpose. However, it’s also important to remember that the saying is not: if you have something unpleasant, difficult or emotional to say, don’t say anything at all. Too often we avoid saying something that might be hard or prompt an emotional response. The belief is that if we abstain from saying anything then we are not responsible. Our     . . . read more

Two New Workshops this Fall

I’m pleased to announce two new mini-workshops, specifically for women, to take place in my office at 203 Anderson Street in Portland, Maine. These are intended to be small and highly interactive, so space is limited. Getting to “No” Guilt-free Tuesday, September 24th 12:00-1:30pm This mini-workshop is for nice women who need specific strategies for how and when to say no, all while overcoming guilt. Whether you are over-extended at home, work, or both, this workshop is designed to give you the tools and confidence you need to stop the stress of never saying no. You will learn: Why no is nice How to gracefully, but firmly, say no When it makes sense to say no Why relationships suffer when you fail to say no How relationships benefit when you say no more often How to recognize unrealistic expectations of     . . . read more

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