(207) 553-2260

What is EMDR and Can It Help Me?

Many people have heard about EMDR. You may be wondering how does it work? Could it help you? EMDR is a means to assist in recognizing and changing the negative responses that weigh us down and inhibit us from living our most fulfilling lives. EMDR helps to fully process and integrate difficult events in our lives, so that we don’t remain stuck. If you find yourself asking “why does that still bother me?” or find yourself repeating patterns or making choices that no longer serve you—despite your best efforts to change them—it may benefit you to talk to an EMDR trained mental health professional. The role of memory networks Our brain has a natural ability to process and integrate information. However, our ability to process information becomes compromised when under stress. When we are unable to process distressing events, the     . . . read more

Too Nervous to Have Hard Conversations? Here are 3 Ways to Make it Less Difficult

It is inevitable in life that you will be faced with situations in which it is essential that you have an uncomfortable conversation. Look, I know that you want to be liked. You care about being seen as cooperative and agreeable. I get that it is a risk to come off as unlikable (especially for women). But we all need to face up to reality. Every aspect of our lives that allow us to thrive are threatened if we don’t accept that sometimes we have uncomfortable communication. Let me say it another way: we can’t have integrity, boundaries, morals, character, thoughts and feelings if we aren’t willing to express them when it’s important to do so. Even if other people don’t like what we are saying. Even if it will be awkward or there will be some feelings involved. These     . . . read more

Burnout Blues? You Need The One Skill Everyone Overlooks

Jennifer is just like you and me – a highly competent, compassionate woman with a great career, a family she adores, and a very full life. On the outside, she looks great. You should see her Facebook photos! On the inside, she’s cooked. Beyond done. A bunch of jangled nerves running on sheer will alone. Jennifer’s been chronically stressed out for so long that her physical and mental health are starting to become compromised. She’s about to burn out big time. For checking all those boxes, doing all the right things, it seems all that she gets in return is exhaustion. And she knows it, but she doesn’t know what to do about it. Jennifer has tried to figure out how to manage her time better, how to cope better, how to practice more and better self-care. She’s read the books     . . . read more

Mature Behavior in 10 Easy (okay…actually pretty difficult) Steps

Though I strive to be sensible and balance reason with carefully considered emotions, I have had to put myself in time-out several times recently. My kids drive me nuts because they are children and we are inside together a lot because it’s winter in Maine, and I want to lose my mind. “Those people” on the internet drive me nuts because, in case you have not observed, things are tense out there. It seems like no matter who you are, every emotional button is being pushed in the current climate. Keeping myself under control is not always easy. Perhaps you can relate. I find it facinating how we work so hard to teach our kids to behave appropriately, meanwhile often misbehaving ourselves. My daughter’s school is amazing. They have beautifully explained expectations for how people treat each other- in the classroom,     . . . read more

Can Respectful Disagreement Bring Us Together?

Being a therapist has taught me that to disagree effectively is to build connection and unity. Talking in-depth for thousands of hours with dozens, if not hundreds, of people has had a profound impact on me. I am wiser, stronger, and happier than I would be otherwise, because I have connected with them and seen the world through their eyes. I also feel more clear that everyone makes sense in the context of their lives. Most people are coming from a good place most of the time. People make choices that reflect their life experience, what they were taught, and what they value. These things vary dramatically person to person, naturally. This seems obvious, but we see the world and speak from our own lens. Every single person has perspectives and internal narratives that are distorted, unhelpful, and just plain     . . . read more