What if you are making key life decisions based on lies and bad information?
I used to think that being exceptional at everything I do, hiding my short-comings, and doing “it all” would get me what I wanted most: confidence, ease, fulfillment and the courage to take on anything.
When I was graduating college, I asked my professor, a woman I looked up to, “How does one become confident?”
By this time, I’d done the things that I thought would lead to confidence. I was a top student at a top college and a clear goal for my future, wasn’t that the path to confidence?
I had gained a lot of competence, but I had not found confidence.
Her answer? Fake it until you make it.
I wasn’t so sure. It didn’t feel right to me. And if she didn’t have the answer, this might prove to be a difficult question.
I’ve spent the last 15 years on a journey to answer that question. I’ve spent 13 years working as a therapist talking for thousands of hours with people who are also on this journey. I don’t know everything, but I know a LOT more.
And I was right: It is not an easy question. No amount of competence substitutes for confidence. And you can’t fake it.
Are you like me? Do you struggle with what it really means to be confident?
Do you continue to strive for perfection and success, hiding your “weaknesses”, believing that surely this is the path to knowing and feeling your self-worth?
Here’s the truth:
Women have been told BIG FAT LIES about what it means to be large and in charge of our lives.
It’s NOT about:
- being more competent
- being more giving
- being fiercely independent
- looking more attractive
- avoiding all conflict
- being perfect
- impressing others
- achieving ALL THE THINGS
- “winning” at life
That’s the path to feeling tired, underappreciated, frustrated, insecure, and continual self-doubt.
Here’s how it works:
You do a great job with something. Now you have to keep it up to continue to prove your worth.
There is always someone better at something than you. You can always do more. There is definitely someone more attractive.
So if you use these standards, how are you supposed to feel enough? When do you arrive?
You don’t. You won’t.
Judging ourselves by the standards of perfection and absolute success and beauty leaves us feeling NEVER GOOD ENOUGH.
It’s a hamster wheel.
Let’s get off this crazy ride, shall we?
The magic is in finding your power and using it the right way.
That’s the path I’ve found. It’s the path I want to show you.
Let’s start with this:
I’ve created a FREE, detailed, step-by-step guide that is an action plan about how to get OUT of the “never good enough” trap, STOP giving away your power, and get back in the driver’s seat of your life.
This guide shows you how to roll up your sleeves, and start taking your power back TODAY.
Let’s do this. Get your free guide right HERE.
Hannah Curtis is a communication coach who teaches purpose-driven people how to use their words with confidence and their power for positive change. Join her for a 12-week communication coaching program, Deep Dive, and have a bigger impact with effective, confident communication.